27o2o9

The only reason why i’m staying up to write this out is only because what i feel is currently now at this moment, if i were to keep it till tomorrow, these feelings may not be accurate anymore.
Life hasn’t been good, i dislike staying at home, daddy doesnt allow me to ‘abandon the sister at home though she’s partly the reason why im not home, but i guess i should just listen, from time to time..

Haven’t been talking to the mother still, its already almost two months, have been doing the laundry for myself for two months, not that it is a big deal because some of the kids actually wash their clothes themselves since young. But since the washing machine’s down, I’m sorry, i can’t wash, hopefully the laundrette gives me a discount or something, :/

Two grace gathering today had cultivated this slight excitement in me, i was really excited cause i haven’t seen the people for really long, for me, it started out fine, but it started becoming abit awkward after that because i felt left out, but very soon everything was adjusted back as we cheered and cut the cake, two grace is Love, two grace is Home. And as we sat alongside the merlion, gosh, how i Miss Phs, how i miss School. The real school, that is not innova, not the stressful syllabus.

And i just feel this something for everyone, and i just don’t want to keep it in actually,
And the two grace’s fave method of arranging people, -according to our register numbers :)

Fishy,
sometimes i see you on the streets, i get surprised, but i don’t usually get to talk to you for long. You are usually busy with your friends, with your canoeing, but you are the same usual crap, you are the same “Hey how have you been, are you attached, do you have anyone you like,lets take a photo together” i miss the rubbish we do in school, i do. And from today onwards, because out of all the two grace people, i see you on the streets most often, i promise myself i will take the extra effort to speak more to you, to ask more about you,

Jolene,
sometimes i feel weird around you, sometimes i feel you just don’t care, whatever it is, in the past you tend to always be there, in the sense that, whenever i’m unhappy, you Just always seem to say the Right things to make me feel better. I remember there was once when i got upset over Wq, you said something to cheer me up, not knowing that it could, not knowing that you actually did make me feel better. I just like to talk to you, because you sound so carefree, you , i don’t know. But somewhere along i just felt that you had this bad impression of me, maybe i know why, and maybe whatever i know is wrong, but try as i might to talk to you during gatherings, i don’t really seem to be able to engage on proper conversations with you, until today, when i talked to you awhile longer. That felt nice, it felt like how you always made me feel better about some things,

Cheyenne,
sometimes i feel it difficult to talk to you, it seems like if i do not phrase my words properly, i tend to Offend you. Sometimes i like ganging up with you to bully the rest of the girls, because they are just so cute when they react to us, i know we had quite a number of difficulties, but most of the times, you’re easy going and forgiving, with the constant “Nvm +  and that few words of where lets forget our misunderstandings. I hope i won’t find it so difficult to talk to you anymore, because after all, do you remember you were one of the first people i talked to, when i first stepped into two grace? :)

Fiona,
sometimes i feel like you’re so neutral, its hard to talk to you. Sometimes you feel evasive, you seem to not want to talk to me. I know very often, cheyenne and the rest meet up, and im rather envious, actually, because i don’t get to see eve and min very often, and i used to study very much with the fionacheyennewenqijolenesometimeskailinggang and i guess thats what hurts the most, i know i like disturbing you, but i dont get to do as much anymore, and when i do try to strike conversations with you, it seems that i can’t hold it long because you seem to walk away,

EveLimYiHuan,
BAOBEII thanks for being there, always there, always listening to my rubbish, always showing love, always giving hugs,
i wish i could meet you more often, talk to you more often, because you always have this optimistic view of things, in ELYH’s opinion, Things Will Always get better :D i know i don’t see you very often, but the love is there, and when we meet, everything just clicks. :) HEY don’t reply my message at 2 plus am, you’re crazy xP i love you :D

LowShiMin
Lsm, talks very little, but says things straight to the point. Maybe not as optimistic as elyh would be, but always says things accurately, responds accurately, you just feel that, whoa, she understands. She doesn’t show it, but she’s there when you need, and Lsm, altho we talk Even lesser, you don’t mind listening to my whole chunk of updates each time, you dont mind giving me your frank opinions, and thats the best part i like about you :) COUNTDOWN, we got to start the next countdown already, yay :) 19th is the nicest Date of the month, RIGHT! :D thankyou for everything :)

Phebe,
dajie, i don’t know whats the reason but it seems like you haven’t called me Mei for quite awhile, altho it was quite ididntlikeit but still i wonder why, and because you’re so busy i see you in the places that im often in, in Innova esp. I don’t know how much i tell you, but i wonder why you actually know excerpts from my life from time to time. Consoles, nags, guides, yeah dajie, God is the light, the way! :) just about the only christian i need that uses the Bible to encourage, altho the celebration was belated, i hoped you enjoyed it, and also that you liked the vest we got for you :)

Pris
HEYYOU. Today’s full strength was incomplete because of your NATAS TRAVEL AT EXPO.
talks to me most on the phone, says rubbish, but because she always lets me talk, i feel better so in the past, i tend to call her to crap, rant on and on, or joke, just to feel better. And it always worked :) hey ahma, WL lar you, everyday WORK WORK WORK, how often do you see full strength from the two grace girls and you didnt appear! :(

Wenqi
i don’t know what i should say to you, i remember we used to promise to end up in the same uni together, remain as friends. I dont know what runs through your mind, honestly, although we both went through so much, i still think you’re difficult to comprehend, and you’re Really unpredictable. I don’t hate you, i never did, but sometimes i just don’t understand the things you do, nor the things you say, or the way you tone your sentences, but i guess you have your own reasons, you have your own understanding, your own opinion and since i dont talk to you at all, i am in no position to say anything, Tc.

Mel
Hey you, what kebun baru station, Okay, so? Hahaha, being the first to leave the twograce clique to be privatised, im glad we still meet from time to time, and that you’re the same and everything’s well. :)

Kailing
Hey:) i don’t have the intention to be fake at all, but because we used to be such close best friends, we used to share everything from our inbox to our diaries, you used to go to lengths for me, you would Do things for me, you would sit under the table and talk me out, you were always there whenever i was upset over Sh, i do miss you as a best friend.
Many things changed, we’re probably not the same anymore, when i saw you the other day outside the driving centre, i didn’t understand your response, i was just puzzled, but i really felt warmed when you took the initiative to actually take a photo with me today.
thanks for asking about me, and talking on the train to me today. Because at least for the moment, i don’t know how it was like for you, but for me, you felt like my best friend back in 2003.

i tend to live alot in the past, although i do take a note to treasure the present, but sometimes, and in fact, many times, i can’t help but look back, and ask myself, what have i done, why does the clique seem broken up, i feel that i should be attributed the blame because of what happened between Wq and me, i feel bad, actually, but today, alongside the merlion, it felt Home. The clique, was my best present from Phs and i will definitely treasure them.

Baby,
things are difficult, everything sucks. My heart really aches whenever i think of you. My heart sinks, and tears well up more often than not. I know i don’t say the nicest things anymore, and i probably upset you with most of the things i say. I don’t get to see you more than a few hours a week, i dont get to even talk to you alot daily. I don’t know how long we can keep this up, but i will try. We will try, i love you.

Goodnight, Baby, 2904, and everyone else.